Series: Hearts Like Firestones
Word Count: ~3200
Warning: Incest (Cousins)
Summary: In his mind there is darkness and power, fire and destruction, the Force and...her. Thoughts of her slip through the cracks of his subconsciousness like water, wind their way down into the dark places of his mind and bloom there hot and white like a flowering vine. Until he's consumed by her.
A/N: OMG, guys, you are all so amazing. \o/ I never expected to receive so much praise and kudos for "Out of the Darkness...". ♥♥♥ THANK YOU SO MUCH! ♥♥♥ Nor did I ever think I'd get so many reviews and comments asking for more. <3 Well, here it is. :D This prequel of a sorts is dealing with what happened after TFA and how it's leading up to the things taking place in OotD. And this whole thing has become kind of a series now. Expect more! :)
Once upon a time he looked upon the light side with hate and disgust, saw it as weak and broken like his first master, there was nothing it had to offer to someone like him, but then he meets that slip of a girl, a mere scavenger from some junkyard backwater desert planet, and everything begins to unravel.
She bests him, gains the upper hand, physically and mentally, and leaves scars on his body and traces of herself in his mind, and he finds himself holding onto that spark of connection crackling between them, a hint of something as strong as the Force but that is running much deeper.
Kylo knows he should sever the connection, break the bond, Snoke would tell him as much, would help him purge her out of his system if he asked, but something holds him back. He tries to tell himself it's because not all hope is lost yet, the dark side could still lure her in and trained by the right master, trained by him, she would bring the galaxy to its knees and restore the empire to its former glory, but then he wakes up one night to the phantom smell of the ocean and ghostly imprint of her touch on his scarred cheek, and Kylo can't deny the truth any longer.
It's not him who calls out to her, not the darkness inside him trying to tempt the light inside her.
It's the other way around — and part of him, the part that once had been Ben Solo and he had thought long dead, slowly stirs at the notion.
Weeks go by, bleed into months, and Kylo can sense her getting stronger, what once had been a raw and untamed enigma is slowly shaped into a form he knows all too well, and there is no doubt in his mind who's responsible for that.
Despite everything, Skywalker has always been a true master of the Force.
The day the Force lights up like it hasn't done in decades, and whispers about the return of the Jedi are heard throughout the galaxy, Kylo puts a dozen Stormtroopers out of commission and lays waste to half of the training ground.
He knows how the story goes.
Snoke observes, studies, sees, and one morning calls for him.
“You seem troubled, Kylo Ren.”
Kylo straightens and keeps his expression blank as he meets his master's gaze. “It is nothing, Supreme Leader.”
Snoke watches him for another long moment before he beckons Kylo closer to kneel before him. “It is far from nothing.” His master reaches out to him and Kylo fights back the sudden urge to block him as he feels Snoke's mind skimming over the surface of his own. “It is the scavenger.” It's not a question.
“Yes,” Kylo admits quietly, the hand resting on his bent knee clenching involuntarily into a fist, the leather creaking from the sudden pressure. Lying would be a waste of time. “But I assure you she—”
A flick of his master's fingers cuts him off and Kylo grits his teeth. “She is consuming your thoughts. The girl is powerful and dangerous,” Snoke says as he steps down from his throne and towards Kylo. “You have failed once, Kylo. I'm giving you the rare chance to redeem yourself.”
Snoke comes to a halt next to him, and his hand is a heavy and foreboding weight on Kylo's shoulder. “Find her. Try to persuade her to join us one last time. Should she refuse, do what you have to do. We cannot let the Light have such a strong mind.”
Kylo swallows hard, and this time he doesn't, can't meet Snoke's eyes. “Yes, Master.” His answer settles like lead in his stomach, weighing down his steps as he rises to his feet and leaves the room.
That night the Force calls to him, draws him in, and he dreams of her, beautiful and fierce, dreams of them and the night in the snow-covered forest on Starkiller Base, but this time it's not the heat of their lightsabers melting the snow around them, and Kylo wakes with a start, his body and mind aching and wanting. His pants stick uncomfortably to his skin, he can feel himself straining against his boxers, and he bites back a curse.
Their bond suddenly flares to life like it had during the interrogation and there's a sudden backlash from her side that slams through him and leaves him breathless. It's confusion and fear, anger at him and at herself, because beneath it all there's a hint of desire, of want that's mirroring his own, and then the rush ends just as abruptly as it had begun as she cuts the connection.
Kylo spends the rest of the night trying to meditate but the dream and her emotions still linger in the shadows at the edge of his mind, and the next morning finds him standing in the middle of his destroyed room, fingertips pressed tightly against the scar on his cheek, his eyes focused on something only he can see.
When the time comes, he will have to make a choice.
He's just no longer sure which will be the right one.
His days become marked by his efforts of locating her, he exhausts every resource at his disposal but every time it seems he's getting close, she slips through his fingers like sand. She is always just out of reach, is always one step ahead of him, and whenever he follows up a lead, her trail has long gone cold and he is forced to start his search anew.
At night, he falls into a restless sleep, his dreams a landscape of blurry images, overwhelming sensations and lingering feelings, and even though he tries to keep tight control over his mind, it's like the dream of them opened a door that he can no longer close properly and now pure light is spilling across his darkness through the small gap.
Kylo takes a little comfort in sensing that she's not faring much better.
One day, while he is listening to one of Hux's boring speeches, he receives notice that she's been sighted on a desert planet he would recognize even with his eyes blind, and Kylo leaves Hux just standing there in the middle of the hallway, his mind already darting here and there.
What could she possible look for on Tatooine of all places?
His grandfather's homeworld has nothing to offer to her, only the beginning of a dark past under a burning sun, and yet she has made the long way there, despite knowing the First Order is keeping a close eye on the planet.
He doesn't bother ordering for a shuttle to be prepared — she has already left the planet again. Instead he pulls up all and every information his resources put together and spends hours trying to solve the mystery.
One file has a video attached, surveillance footage in questionable quality but it's the first time he's seeing her again, and when she looks at the camera, looks at him across the distance of time and space, he reaches out before he quite knows what he's doing, gloved fingertips brushing almost gently across the screen.
Then the screen turns dark, and so does his mood, and when he steps out of the room, the console lies in smoldering pieces.
What were you doing there, he thinks, pushing angrily and frustrated at the border separating him from her, the grey line between dark and light, but she stays stubbornly silent. The air around him turns violent, the Force rippling with his emotions, and for the rest of the day he stalks through the First Order's new base like the Dark Side personified.
When night falls, he is still seething and as a last resort to find his composure again, he settles down to meditate. He sinks into his own mind, into the Force, and finds himself on an island, surrounded by an endless ocean. He's on his back and she's right above him, and for a moment his mind goes blank and his mouth dries out at the sight of her almost bare, sun-kissed skin against his black clothes.
Then she presses her hands to his chest, fingers splaying across his shirt, and sits back in a way that makes him hiss through his teeth and brings him out of his haze. Heat and anger